Advice from Mom

Life is so much better now than it was in my Life with Liam post. We're still trying to figure some things out, but life seems much more manageable now.

However...

Back in the dark days (actually, only a week ago- it's hard to believe things can change so quickly!) when breastfeeding was still absolute agony, I reached the end of my rope. In all honesty, it probably wasn't the first time that day, but there I was around 11 PM: tired, alone (Joseph was out that evening) and being screamed at by a baby who wanted food AGAIN. That was all I could take that day, and with no one else to talk to, I wrote a short exasperated email to my mom. I would have called her, but she was out of the country. Her advice to me was so good (and eerily accurate) that I just had to share it.

Me: "I hate everything about breastfeeding!!!! Why does this have to be such a problem?!?!?!?!? He just downed a 4.5 oz bottle an hour and a half ago and he’s yelling again. WHY ME??????"


Mom: "Hi Baby Girl,

I was thinking about you this morning and wondering how everything is going. It can take 4-6 weeks for nursing to become second nature...again. You will be so happy you stuck with it. 'Why?!!', you may implore. One word: oxytocin. This hormone is a gift from God to all mothers...indeed to all peoples everywhere. It keeps exhausted, fussy moms on the verge of joining their toddlers and infants in a temper tantrum instead blessedly calm, serene, and a bit forgetful. "Who cares if the dog threw up in the corner, the toddler finger painted in it and then played in the mountain of clean laundry with said befouled digits all while the phone rang and dinner burned?", the nursing mother puzzles. She smiles lazily and snuggles in with her infant while turning on any cartoon that will immobilize the toddler long enough for her to catch her breath, re-order her priorities (Shower? Naah. Brush teeth? Hopefully.), and marvel in the wonderful cocktail of hormones bathing her brain and calming her spirit. She gives thanks to the Lord and looks forward to the next feeding.

Really! It happens. Keep a brief log of the shenanigans that multiple kiddos (& pets) bring into your life. You will be amazed! And know that mothers deserve praise the other 364 days of the year too. ;o)"

How she knew that that morning the dog had thrown up on the floor, forcing me to put Liam down in the middle of nursing (causing him to scream) to clean it up while shooing Diana away from it and the floor cleaner I was using (causing her to cry) is beyond me. But she was absolutely right. Moms have a special talent for that. I'm still waiting to receive that talent. Nursing is easy again, praise God! I can feel myself getting wound up tighter and tighter during the day as my plans fall apart and my toddler and dog wreck my clean house and Liam screams to be fed while I change him, but when I finally do sit down, I feel elated and then calm and happy. Breastfeeding hormones really are designed to keep mothers sane. As I sit next to Diana who is being distracted for a few blissful moments by an episode of Kipper and snuggle with Liam, even in the midst of toppled piles of laundry, dog hair, globs of oatmeal spilled on the floor and scattered stuffed animals, I feel happy and peaceful.